Monday, 31 October 2016

Chronicles of a Bride- I

Do you remember your first job? How excited you were to land in it? The thrill of doing something “Real”?  The relief that you have a job finally? Well, that’s how it feels when wedding gets settled too. Doesn’t matter if it’s a love marriage or an arranged marriage.

What’s so different between the first job and the wedding is that, you have no clue in the latter. This blog series is going to be an undiluted sarcastic view of the wedding world through the eyes of bride.
When you join a job, they give you training for tasks and then conduct an assessment at the end of the training. You have no such option in the wedding. You are assessed immediately and guess what, no training happens. There is not even a syllabus you could refer to.

We all are academically well qualified and are so fond of exams (at least in India). In Wedding, there’s no syllabus, no classes, no teaching, just straight exams- that too board exams. What more, you are expected to perform exemplary as your family respect depends on that. 

If at all, you scourge some tips from grandmas and moms, they are all Out-of-Syllabus for our exam. For example, grandma syllabus doesn’t warn you that having a funky mobile cover will fetch you 50 negative points. Or for that matter, making Maggi isn’t considered as cooking.

At a MNC, your appraisal is kept to yourself, or at least you get to know it first. As a bride, your appraisal score reaches you last with ten different versions. If only, there was a course in distance education to get Masters in Being a Bride, it would’ve done womankind a greater good. Had we also had tuition centre for bride-coaching, the seats would sell faster than a box-office movie.

Even with an impressive CV alias Matrimony profile, you can never be assured of having a hassle free transition from Happily-single/ In-a-relationship to Bride. End of the day, no matter how many miseries are bundled together, it’s a joy to behold. Having a new family, raising your own- all those childhood dreams coming true. Every bride has a different syllabus and a different exam to give. May be that’s why there’s no course in becoming a bride.

Have you faced any misery? Let me know in the comments..

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